Report: You Better Be Back In Your Dorm By Now

LIBERTY CAMPUS – An official report released just moments ago stated that, given the close proximity to curfew, you better be back in your dorm by now.

The report went on to say that your RA is just outside your room and about to poke their curious head in.

It’s advised that if you don’t want to experience any forced small talk that you fake being asleep immediately.

At publishing time, a source said that anyone who is still out and about at this hour is probably a pagan, because nothing good happens after 12 a.m.

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